A Baby Hippo Named Charlie Thinks He’s A Rhino: The BEST Thing On The Internet


Hippos, of course, look very cute but are known to be about as agreeable as an Eric Abetz. Of course, the truth about ‘hippo aggression’ wasn’t all that well known a decade or so ago, but it’s now one of those ‘facts’ that people who like to prove how many facts they know bring up at dinner parties and work functions.

‘Did you know that hippos kill more people than lions?’ Yeah, we did. Everyone does. Because of dickheads like you who prey on long-suffering people like me… at dinner parties and work functions.

In any event, having clearly established that hippos should be left alone, there are, of course, exceptions to every rule. And in the hippo world, that exception comes in the form of Charlie, a baby hippo who lives at the Zululand Rhino Orphanage, in South Africa.

Long story short, Charlie the hippo believes he’s a rhinoceros because he was raised, as the name suggests, at a rhino orphanage.

The problem is, hippos need water, otherwise they get sunburnt. And rhinos don’t really swim very much. So if Charlie is going to hang with his rhino friends, how is he not going to fry in the hot African sun?

We won’t spoil the punchline, but please enjoy today’s Best Thing On The Internet (an occasional column in New Matilda aimed at annoying disagreeable things like an Eric Abetz).

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