The threat is grave. The stakes, high. And Very Serious Politician Pauline Hanson has a Very Serious message for her followers: Australian culture is in the dunny. The cradle of Australian culture, the toilet, is at risk.
In a video broadcast to her followers on the weekend the One Nation Senator, who will be joined in the new parliament by three One Nation colleagues, linked a toilet redesign at the Australian Tax Office to the demise of the Australian way of life.
Hanson was referencing reports that the Australian Tax Office had installed a small number of squat toilets at its Box Hill office in Victoria, to help cater for the culturally diverse staff. One article noted that there is some reason to think such toilets also provide health benefits.
But Pauline Hanson was not swayed by such arguments – perhaps because she, unlike most Australians, excretes exclusively from the mouth.
“I can’t believe that my topic of conversation today is squat toilets,” the Senator said.
Which is weird because we absolutely can. But back to you, Senator.
“You’re saying what? Yes! It’s been brought to my attention that the Australian Tax Office are going to put in squat toilets because over 20 per cent of their staff is from a non-English speaking background.”
Hanson then squatted down to imitate the way a squat toilet is used. That is Australian Senator, Pauline Hanson. Who is about to begin six years in the Senate.
“Well if they don’t know how to use our toilets, regardless of just at the ATO, our parks, convention centres, in the Aussie homes, everywhere else, then what the hell is going on? Because I know what is more confusing and it’s definitely not using a squat toilet, it’s doing our tax.”
There are a couple of things to note here. Firstly, Hanson is using this to whip-up hate against Australians from non-English speaking backgrounds. This is a little ironic. As the above sentence demonstrates, she has her own problems delivering coherent sentences in the English language.
Secondly, Hanson basically just suggested someone is going to break into your home, rip the bowl from the ground, and perform a mandatory bathroom renovation. This sounds more like the kind of reality TV pitch Channel Nine executives throw around when The Block is out of season than a serious cultural threat.
Finally, Hanson appears to have confused her own message. In what was intended to be a joke about the ATO, she admits it’s actually probably easier to use a squat than file your tax returns. It’s almost as if she knows there are bigger issues facing everyday Australians than the installation of two toilets at one ATO building.
But Hanson didn’t stop there. As one person in the comments wondered aloud how much this would cost taxpayers, Hanson’s official Facebook page responded: “It’s not just a matter of dollars Wade. It starts with toilets and ends with costing us our Australian way of life.”
First they came for the toilets but I did nothing because I wasn’t a…toilet person?
Well, thankfully for Australians, Pauline Hanson is a toilet person.
The video marks a departure for the Senator. Usually intent on attacking non-white cultures, Hanson now appears to be arguing that dinky di, white Australian, love-it-or-leave-it, true blue culcha finds its origins in the place of ablutions.
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