Kevin's Running A China Shop

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You don’t have to be Gerard Henderson to know that the Chinese regime is already running Australia. We may go through the motions of having a "parliament", of holding "elections", of believing Kerry O’Brien isn’t a Chinese-made android. But the reality is, the Howard government was Australia’s last independent, free government. The Rudd Government is merely a shopfront for Beijing.

Of course, this didn’t happen overnight. Gough Whitlam fell in love with China all those years ago, and despite the Chinese finding Bob Hawke inexplicably "scary", it was Paul Keating’s obtuse conviction that we were somehow part of Asia that really did us in. The fact is that Labor, without understanding a single word the Chinese were saying, couldn’t resist a nice fat Chinese junket.

The New South Wales Labor Right has been meeting at the Golden Century Seafood Restaurant in Sydney’s Chinatown for as long as anyone can remember. The fact that even the abalone tank is bugged doesn’t seem to phase anyone. When I used to attend lunches there to get cosy with heavies from the NSW Labor Council, you’d never see the same wait staff twice. The only time I recognised one of them was when I went to get my visa application stamped over at the Chinese consulate. The young bloke looked at me knowingly and I pretended I didn’t recognise him. I’m not afraid to join the dots.

Ever since then, I’ve watched the way the Chinese operate with a heightened level of suspicion. The only other people who seem to hold a similar view are the federal Coalition and the entire state of Queensland. We all laughed at Howard and Downer during APEC when Kevin Rudd wowed the world with his linguistic prowess. But no one else realised we had our own Manchurian Candidate when Rudd said "是的,先生,不,先生, 3袋全先生".

And now we have the current dramas with the Defence Minister, poor old Joel Fitzgibbon. Most of us would realise when we’ve been shanghai-ed, but Fitzgibbon is from Cessnock, and of course, things take a little longer to sink in there. Having travelled to China with Helen Liu, moved into her Canberra apartment and been given a new suit, Fitzgibbon clearly thought she was just another charitable Chinese business woman. These new claims that she is a threat to national security seem a little dated. China’s national security is now our national security.

Fortunately we have the vigilant foot soldiers at News Ltd, who know the inherent dangers of being completely overrun by the most populated nation on Earth. One who isn’t afraid to blow the hysteria horn is Christian Kerr. I’ve watched this video of him three times, and it’s a masterclass in China Not Like Us, China Bad 101. (While you’re stuck on the Oz video site, check out young Matthew Franklin from London and discover the "secret knock" to get into No 10 Downing Street.)

There are other telltale signs that Labor has sold us off to China. Senator Stephen Conroy’s joyful performance on Your ABC last week certainly sated my mind. With talk that the ACMA blacklist could include non-prohibited materials and lacked transparency, Conroy eloquently stated, "What’s the point in having a list if someone else can see it?" Deng Xiaoping couldn’t have said it better himself.

Anyone who caught the show would have seen the "anarchist" audience member who was given a chance to ask a question and could have buried the floundering Conroy once and for all on the role of government in a free democracy. The entire tech community of Australia watched anxiously, waiting for him to fire the final shot into Conroy’s defence. Instead, looking suspiciously like a bearded carnie from Melbourne’s Moomba Festival, he made the unexpected segue, "Senator Conroy, don’t you realise that 1984 was supposed to be a warning, not an instruction manual?"

Don’t doubt for a second that he was a Chinese plant.

The time is ripe to look at a few other instruction manuals the Rudd Government seems to be reading from. Margaret Atwood’s The Handmaid’s Tale and Ayn Rand’s Anthem would both come in handy. The two most powerful women in Canberra? Both are barren and unmarried. Gillard may even get married off to the Taiwanese, or one of Kim Jong Il’s sons, if it suits Beijing. And Penny Wong? Well, enough said. Homebirths soon to be illegal in Australia, rates of breastfeeding falling, caesarean sections skyrocketing — how many more similarities to loveless China do we need?

Also, is it just me, or is there something highly suspicious about NSW Premier Nathan Rees? With a budget in serious debt, he decided to award the $150 million contract for up to 267,000 laptops for NSW school kids to the majority Chinese-owned Lenovo. That’s 267,000 tracking and monitoring devices in Aussie schools and homes.

And Kevin Rudd spends more time pushing for China to run the G20 than addressing the plight of our drought-stricken farmers. He even has secret meetings with Chinese people. Except for the fact that the media reports that the meetings took place, which I suppose doesn’t really make them so secret.

Our PM even kicked up a faux-fuss, unhappy with the seating arrangements for a British TV panel which had him sitting next to Madam Fu Ying, the Chinese ambassador to Britain. This is a classic espionage double-play which obviously saw Rudd singing from the same song sheet.

Finally, China is stretching its bloodied claws out to grab our innocent, environmentally responsible mining conglomerates. Labor will screech that we have tough Australian foreign ownership rules but as we all know too well, rules are made to be broken.

We can only pray there will be a double dissolution and China won’t step in and declare Martial Law. Perhaps if true Australians see sense and vote the Coalition back in, we can return to being independent and free. We all feel much more comfortable with those B-52s and Globemasters flying in at all hours, unchecked from Guam. Of course, we don’t know what exactly goes on at Pine Gap, but it can’t be that bad. And we’ve only participated in the invasion of a handful of sovereign states with our true friend and ally. An ally we can trust implicitly. I mean, up until recently, they were white like us.

New Matilda

New Matilda is independent journalism at its finest. The site has been publishing intelligent coverage of Australian and international politics, media and culture since 2004.

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