Well, one of the longest running debates in history has been settled, and in spectacular fashion, at precisely the venue you might expect.
It’s official: Elon Musk, the world’s richest man and the owner of ‘X’, formerly known as Twitter, has the biggest, baddest penis on the planet.
And if not that, then certainly a very mean, very significant penis. And if not that, then it’s definitely larger and angrier and tougher than your average penis.
And if not that then… look, the man is packing mucho calor, okay?
Yesterday, Musk used his Twitter account to let his 158.4 million followers know that he’s not at all, not in the least, not even one tiny bit, self-conscious about the size of the world’s wealthiest ‘old fella’.
Behold.
Hip-firing my Barrett 50 cal pic.twitter.com/OkNnjWid0r
— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) September 30, 2023
That there is a Barrett M82 .50 calibre recoil-operated, semi-automatic anti-materiel rifle. Colour? Black. Just like badass Elon’s clothing, which is also all black, including black jeans, black t-shirt, and black headphones (to protect the world’s richest ears).
In other news, Musk, who was born in South Africa and emigrated to the US in 2002, complains that immigration to the US is out of control.
The border crisis is worse every day! New York City is buckling under the load already. https://t.co/jhQ4rCujJz
— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) September 29, 2023
He also reveals that “Newspapers basically just report on what they read yesterday on X”. He added an “lmao” (which means ‘laugh my (enormous)-ass-(penis)-off) in order to ensure the statement didn’t go over the heads of any 12-year-old internet bros, who make up the majority of Musk’s fan base.
Newspapers basically just report on what they read yesterday on X lmao
— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) September 29, 2023
Which if you think about it is true… Musk’s big penis tweet was posted yesterday. We’re just bringing it to you now. Touché Elon The Massive, touché.